Financial Freedom for Creative Souls
Stop selling everything you love
I was almost three years into private cello lessons and all of my teachers said I had musical promise. It was not my first instrument and as a dancer I thrived in the physicality, the complete involvement, and challenge of learning to play. What I wanted, I explained to my teachers, was to build enough technical prowess to express myself freely. From there I could decide if I would attempt any sort of gigging, busking, or monetization. “Or maybe,” my teacher cut in, “you might love it enough not to put a price-tag on it.”
As Americans, we have a real problem with monetizing absolutely everything. Friends and family used to greet you at the airport, now its a stranger driving you in silence, and no one is dropping off soup to your sick friend. Spending precious resources on creative hobbies and pursuits feels practically shameful if they are not also pulling in hard cash. And I once read a post that seriously advocated for couples monetizing their sex life through only fans (no judgement, do you boo boo). But how the hell did we get here? Who decided that anything that can make money should make money?
Don’t take this as gospel, but I think there are a couple factors at play. And one of them has been the rallying cry of the self-help industrial complex for quite some time.
“Do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life!”
This, or some version of this slogan, fills so much of our cultural thinking. And I understand why. Americans are overworked and absolutely starving for joy (not to be confused with drowning in cheap entertainment). If someone offered them a way out of the perpetual rat-race, who wouldn’t latch onto the new narrative without question? In that world we do not have to reassess our relationship with work in the wider scope of a whole human life, we just have to change lanes on the same massive freeway.
Personally, I try not to assume evil intent before considering ignorance. I truly don’t think the writers and motivational speakers who pedal these ideas are bad people, we just took their advice and wandered a little too far into literalism. We did the one thing that comes naturally as Americans, we viewed it through the narrow and singular lens of career. Combine that with the distinctly American way of equating hard financial times with a character defect (being dumb or lazy) and we have the perfect storm for existential crises all around.
On one end of the spectrum, I know people who hold respectable jobs that think something must be wrong with them for not catapulting their side hobby into a multi-billion dollar business. On the other hand I have creative friends in LA who, in the wake of the financial clusterfluff that is the last three years, think themselves a failure when their art does not always pay the bills. Everybody thinks something is wrong with them, and I just want to shake them and say, “Dear one, you are fine!”
To the employees or corporate crusaders:
Have a hobby! Dare to indulge in something that brings you pleasure and joy simply for its own sake, and relish in the gorgeous fact that it does not have to answer to anyone. No stockholders for yo-yo tricks or amateur kite building. No clients or bosses to woo as you plunk your way through Mozart. Your joy is absolutely enough.
And to my creatives and entrepreneurial friends:
Take the day-job! Find something that is not soul sucking and embrace the nobility of giving the whole of your life balance. Your creativity will thank you for giving it an extra leg to stand on, and none of this makes you a failure or a sell out. Try to remember when your creativity was fun. You are not just an artist, you are a human who loves to make things. So free yourself up to make more things and don’t give it a second thought.
To both:
Your job is not the only thing that makes you special/worthwhile/unique/or valuable.
You are a human being, and no one gets to dictate the shape of your joy-filled life.
As Americans, we love the creative or entrepreneur who takes the leap… on the specific conditions that they eventually “make it.” Meaning they must at some appointed and unspoken time make enough money for the rest of us to feel comfortable with their life choices. We encourage young people to “shoot for the moon” and “find their passion” but leave out the part about how they will be judged if we don’t see some results money. A young person chasing their dream is seen more favorably than the 38 year old who still hopes to make it as a [insert literally any creative job here].
This is some wild mental gymnastics happening here. It keeps some people stuck in jobs they hate because they are terrified of failing, while others denying the reprieve of a well balanced life because they also do not want to feel like a failure (especially at something they have a passion for). Under that cloud, everybody feels awful and life is hard enough, we just don’t need it. I promise you we don’t.
Money just can’t be the only measure we use to label something (especially our tender human selves) as worthwhile. My best friend Allie told me that when she explained to a stranger how she was publishing her first fantasy novel and was now really hoping for it to “do well,” the man just asked her if she enjoyed the process of writing it? (As her best friend, I know there were days where putting pen to paper was like rolling a stone up a hill, but the whole process was meaningful to her in ways she is still processing.) So she said yes and the man simply nodded very matter of factly and said, “then it is already a success.”
Lovebug, if you are reading this, your joy has value. Living a meaningful life has value. The sweet time you take to daydream and do nothing has value. Your time with your children has value. Meals shared with friends has value. You know the address of every blessing that brings you life. Zoom out, take a step back, and plan your life path around frequent visits. Be an omnivore of joy! Eat at whatever banquet will seat you. And for goodness sake…
Dare to love something so much that it never sees a price-tag
PS
I wrote this post at the beginning of the week. I usually like to sleep on my writing for a second before I come back, edit, and share. And in the time it took me to do that I feel like I had one more thought I would like to add. If life feels especially hard right now, hard times do not always call for harder work. Sometimes they are actually just the rallying cry we need to shake our private and individual selves awake. Lean into your relationships, today you may be the one asking for support, or maybe you are as Rumi says, “the lamp, the lifeboat, or the ladder” that someone needs at this very moment. The only way to know, is to get out of our own heads, and into each others’ lives.
Love Notes to Little Things:
Salsa Dancing. 10/10 would recommend. Thank you to my friend Jordyn for recommending and taking us out to this lovely little Salsa Club. Did we know what we were doing? No. Did we have a blast anyway? ABSOLUTELY!
As long as the weather is right, you will find me and my husband on the beach. I grew up next to the ocean, but completely took the opportunity for granted as a child. As an adult, I have been reminded how wonderfully blessed I am to live near the ocean—largely thanks to my husband who spent most of his adult life in gloomy and cold London. If you are someone who’s schedule has been magically opened up due to the actor strikes like mine has, take the time and go dunk yourself in the ocean. The slow seasons are just as much a gift as the bustling ones.
This is an actual text message I received from a friend while I was having a hard day.
You do not know who’s life is held up by your hope, your love, your optimism or joy. This friend proceeded to give me the following speech, knowing that I had to walk into some difficult rooms with some difficult people.
This leads perfectly into a Rumi quote that just got me as well this week.
Great Reads:
“Be a lamp, or a lifeboat, or a ladder. Help someone’s soul heal. Walk out of your house like a shepherd.” - Rumi
Stay tender and stay true lovebugs,
Dakota
Amazing post. Thank you!